Christian Engravers

Here's a website providing engraved plaques and similar items. From a recent post on Familymanweb.com forums:

[Raising a Modern Day Knight] helped me to see the importance of raising Godly young men for the Lord as well showing me their examples of what they did for their sons so that they would remember and never forget. This token of rememberence is vital and anything you can present to him will be forever engraved with him (pun intended). This weighs heavy on my heart as I would have loved something similar from my dad. The other men I included in this ceremony for my son were just as blessed as we were also.

Some of you know that my family and I run a Christian Engraving Business. With that being said, I have some solid Marble 8x10 plaques I could engrave for you to present to your son (if interested).

Check out the website: http://christianengravers.com/

Christian Knighting Ceremony

While shopping for a medieval sword for my son, I came across this great source for swords, armor, period gifts, etc from the Roman, Medieval, and the Renaissance periods.

Not only do they have a ton of great stuff for the collector, reenactor, and gift giver...but they are also Christians committed to using their business as a platform to share the gospel:

Real Armor of God.com is a Christian based business promoting the gospel message of "forgiveness of our sins against the one and only true God, through the death and resurrection of Jesus Christ."

In addition to providing a full online store, they also have a few articles about using their products for teaching Christian truth, particularly the "Armor of God" analogy.

One article that really caught my eye is the detailed description of a "modern day knight" knighting ceremony. This is one family's take on the concept of Christian rights-of-passage. Give it a read for some really cool ideas and inspiration.

Christian "Right of Passage" Knighting Ceremony

Leaving a Legacy

I'm finally getting around to journaling my youngest son's first ceremony.

The weakest link in the chain of these "rights of passage" I've been doing with my boys is the capturing on paper(or computer) of what we did, how it went, and most importantly the feelings
and impact it made on us.

My hope is that writing it up will encourage and inspire other dads as well as be a lasting keepsake for my boys...something that will be a legacy they can share with their kids someday.

Robert Lewis makes this point by using the Legacy Album. Another approach I've seen is Letters from Dad.

If/when I finish journalling, I'll post it here.

In the meantime, here is a picture of my youngest son after the ceremony holding the rock he received as an object lesson as well as a filled in Manhood Ceremony Plan that reflects what we actually did:

Sammy's "Lad" Ceremony Plan (doc)
Sammy's "Lad" Ceremony Plan (pdf)

Sword Metaphor

As I've mentioned, my oldest son has a ceremony coming up. It is scheduled for this weekend. Using the sword as the metaphor, here are the principles I'll be imparting for this "stage":

A True Man has a Purpose. He has:

• An Adventure to Live (Hilt)
• A Battle to Fight (Blade)
• A Reward to Gain (Pommel)
• A Work to Do (Guard)
• A God to Serve (Sword tip)

Buying a Sword

I've mentioned before that I decided to present my oldest son a sword for one of the stages of his progression towards manhood.

Well, he was supposed to receive it a year ago (I'm starting to detect a trend here) but I am just now to the point where I am ready to purchase his sword and arrange a ceremony.

As far as sword buying goes, it is not for the uninitiated. There are lots of nuances and pitfalls to choosing the right weapon. The best place to start researching is definitely:

Sword Buyers Guide .com

Here you will find a primer on sword basics and terminology, "war stories" on what can wrong when buying a sword, reviews of several manufacturers as well as specific swords, guides for various types and styles, an online magazine, even a forum area. Everything you need to get started is there.

After pretty extensive research I decided to go with The Warspike: Knight Longsword. It's a “hybrid” Hand-and-a-Half Medieval sword with a hand-forged, High-carbon steel, fully heat tempered, "battle-ready" full tang blade from StrongBlade. (yeah, that's a mouthful...check out SBG to understand what all that means)

I'll probably post a review of the experience once I receive and present it to him. But in the meantime, my advice is to start early with any ceremonies you may be planning!

Rock It Creations

When we had my middle son's first ceremony I used an online service to laser engrave a marble block for me.

For my youngest son, I went a different route and had a river stone engraved (I'm a firm believer that each child's ceremony should be tailored for their personality).

Here's the company I went with. They did a very good job and were easy to work with. The final product came out a little bigger (ie, heavier) than I intended, but I think the Lord worked it out so that I could really drive home the weight of the principles I'm imparting.

I'll try to post pictures of the finished product in the near future.

Rock It Creations

Planning for Manhood

I'm finally taking my youngest son away for his first manhood ceremony this weekend...one year late.

That's right, I'm a guy that eats and breaths this manhood stuff (teaching classes, running a blog, helping other guys with ceremony ideas, etc.) and still I let a whole year slip by on me!

I know from leading a Raising a Modern Day Knight class at my church that it can be hard for any man to stay on task with his plans in this area. We are generally good at coming up with the vision...but lacking in the execution.

Here's a Word doc I came up with last Fall to help you design a ceremony. Writing it out (with a date attached) helps the planning process start and provides a level of accountability. Give it a try.

ManhoodCeremonyPlan

The Armor of God

Part of creating impactful ceremonies with your kids when conducting a rite of passage or manhood/womenhood ceremony is presenting them with a meaningful, valuable keepsake.

These can be as simple as a rock picked up along the path or as elaborate as a personalized, inscribed sword. If the item carries with it symbolic meaning and reminders of the principles that have been imparted, all the better.

Here are some great items I stumbled upon that fit this description wonderfully...all based on the Biblical metaphor of "The Armor of God". These would make a great gift at any age to remind your son that he is a warrior belonging to the Army of God.

I've seen the dog tag item in person and was impressed by the quality. Check it out:

The Armor of God products

Christ in the Tetons

I've mentioned before that I've been leading a six week class going through the Raising a Modern Day Knight video series.

One of the best things about these videos are the segments where the dads and sons are taking on exciting adventures in the Grand Tetons. Having these inspiring backdrops as Robert Lewis imparts the principles from the book definitely adds impact.

The good news is that we fathers have the opportunity to have the same experience with our sons through Christ in the Tetons, an organization that provides "Father and Son Adventures".

They have just release their 2009 schedule so go check it out:

Christ in the Tetons

Rite of Passage Parenting

Here's what looks to be a great book to read and site to explore concerning rites of passage. It looks like the author really digs into and explores what is at the core of rights of passage and attempts to teach willing parents how to build into their children''s lives the essential experiences every child needs.

If you are concerned about the effects of the current cultural chaos; if you notice in your children a lack of responsibility, the lack of a good work ethic, disrespect for authority; if you are worried that your children may experiment with false rites of passage-profanity, smoking, drugs, alcohol, body piercing, or sex-let Walker Moore show you how to provide the four essential experiences most children are missing.

ROPParenting

You Say It's Your Birthday?

It's "birthday season" around our house. We have a string of months in a row (Jan - April) where I and the kids have birthdays. (My wife is the oddball with a b-day in October)

I think we tend to be rather normal for suburbia...we do an occasional "go all out" event at a kid-oriented fun center, or a themed dress-up party now and then. Most years are rather low key, consisting only of those family traditions we have established over the years.

However, a lot of the rites of passage stuff I have embraced is predicated on birthday thresholds and the celebration of arriving at a new "stage". In that sense, certain birthdays are seen as a big deal in our household.

With that in mind I present a couple of short opinion articles on celebrating birthdays as Christians. I am still digesting these but would be interested in other's opinions.

Should a Christian Celebrate Birthdays? Article 1

Should Christians Celebrate Birthdays? Article 2

Stanley London Manhood Gifts

So you've made the decision to create a cermony for your son to celebrate his passage toward manhood, but you have no idea what kind of gift to get him?

I've shared in the past a great place to get engraved stones/rocks, but here is another website with a large selection of brass instruments like compasses, sextants, telescopes, other nautical instruments, and even swords. They'll do custom engraving on most of their items.

I purchased a compass from them and had it engraved with some principles around "Choosing a Direction" and the verses Proverbs 3:5-6 for my son on his 10th birthday. It turned out great!

Stanley London

Organic Faith - Rites of Passage Celebrations

From the Organic Faith website under the Featured Resource header comes a great little pdf article on Rites of Passage Celebrations:

Tips and ideas for developing meaningful experiences that help mark the transition from childhood to manhood. These ideas will help youth leaders and parents develop Biblically-based rite of passage events for teenage young men.

Organic Faith - Rites of Passage Celebrations

The Blessing

John Trent and Gary Smalley have taught and written about The Blessing for almost thirty years. On their website you’ll find tools and encouragement to help you understanding this powerful biblical concept, as well as pass the Blessing down to your loved ones.

[this] best-selling book offers a fresh, updated look at the life-changing gift the Bible calls “the blessing.” Many of us—perhaps unknowingly—spend a lifetime striving for this acceptance. The unconditional love and approval that comes with the blessing is an important element of our self-esteem and emotional well-being.

In The Blessing, Dr. John Trent tells of his search to receive the blessing from his father and the new insight—and deeper blessing—he received from God as he sought to pick up the pieces of his shattered dream. And Gary Smalley expands the concept of the blessing to include eight ways to bless adult children. “I never realized how powerful—and how necessary—the blessing has become to my older children until now. So if you have older children who have moved away from home, they’re never out-of-reach of the blessing.”

The Blessing is a powerful book no family should be without. Within its pages, readers will find solid, practical advice on how to be a blessing as well as how to insure that your parents, spouse, and children all feel the security of family approval.

The Blessing

Raising a Modern Day Knight - Insights

Here is a very short 4 entry blog (quick easy read) from a guy that implemented the RaMDK techniques with his son. This is a great real world example of how to get it set up, what to expect, and some really concise insights on how it went.

Of particular interest to me was this insight:

Some guys see this whole thing as "overblown".
Guys that grew up in stable, loving homes may see this whole thing as a little over the top. These guys likely received their father's blessing, leadership, and counsel throughout their lives. All of this became a part of their lives in such a natural way that it's hard for them to recognize the importance. Frankly, these guys are at greatest risk for dropping the ball with their own sons. Their response is often: "what's the big deal?"

Check it out:

Raising a Modern Day Knight Insights

Boys Will Be Boys

Even though this article references non-Christian sources and examples, here is a good general introduction to the concept of "Rites of Passage". If you have wondered why there is such a growing emphasis on them and what they are all about, read this short article to come up to speed.

I really like the acrostic the author created to help men formulate their own rite of passage: "The R.I.T.E. Approach". It stands for "Read, Investigate, Target, Evaluate"...all of which are essential steps to creating a meaningful ceremony for the boys in your life.

Boys Will Be Boys: Rites of Passage and Male Teens

Unfading Beauty

For my daughter's 10 birthday, my wife and I performed a womanhood ceremony with her (we do this every 3 years for the ages 7 through 19).

We took her to Duke Gardens, a beautiful renowned garden near our home. As we walked around the gardens surrounded by beautiful flowers and landscaping, we shared with her five principles that we hope will encourage her as she continues to grow into a Godly woman.

The first principle has to do with "Unfading Beauty", how a true woman's focus is not only on her outward beauty, but on her inward beauty. Below is a copy of the actual letter we gave her. I am convinced our daughters need to hear words of encouragement from their dads.

Unfading Beauty

BreakAway's Father-Son Adventure 2007

HIGH ADVENTURE
7-Day Trip July 29 - August 4, 2007

Take on our life-changing excursions and become wilderness warriors together. You’ll hike, rock climb, raft and relax in the majestic mountains of Colorado—all for the purpose of connecting as fathers and sons. In addition to hiking, rock climbing and white-water rafting, fathers and sons will have plenty of time to relax and have fun together at Silver Cliff Ranch.

The deadline for High Adventure has officially passed; however, they're still accepting applications for a VERY FEW remaining positions.

BREAKAWAY'S FATHER-SON ADVENTURES 2007

Picker Point -- My Manhood Ceremony

Here is a great blog entry from a man who was given a surprise manhood ceremony by his father-in-law, brothers-in-law, grandfather-in-law, and his dad. He gives a nice account of the experience and expresses how he was affirmed by these important men in his life.

For those who aren’t familiar with what a "Manhood Ceremony" is, it’s a tradition that families start in order to affirm and bless the young men in their family as they are coming into manhood.

Usually it is done for a teen but really it could be done at any time. Check out the post for inspiration:

Picker Point -- My Manhood Ceremony

Generations of Light -- Purity Ball

Randy Wilson has put together a very nice website that ties together several concepts including intentional discipling, meaningful ceremonies, and imparting of blessings.

There are quite a few articles, videos, and resources available on the site, most with the focus of preparing your daughters to flourish in adulthood.

Probably the best know thing to come out of his ministry is the concept of the "Purity Ball". I had heard of it but didn't know the details...this site has all the info you could want:

The Father Daughter Purity Ball is a memorable ceremony for fathers to sign commitments to be responsible men of integrity in all areas of purity. The commitment also includes their vow to protect their daughters in their choices for purity.

Generations of Light Purity Ball