Earned. Never Given?

Driving into work yesterday I saw a truck with the Marine saber ad on its side with the emblazoned "Earned. Never Given" quote. It started me thinking about that in terms of Christian Manhood. Is it truly the case that our sons have to earn their manhood by demonstrating to us their abilities/willingness/readiness or is it the case that by us giving them the moniker of "man" that they strive to live up to it?

I am torn on this issue, especially in the light of the grace that God has so freely given us. The basic Christian doctrine is that we are unable to earn our righteousness, but that it is freely given. Shouldn't the same transaction take place between a father and his son?

This is especially apropos for me right now as my oldest son's 16th birthday is approaching and I am planning to give him a sword to symbolize his next step toward manhood. I will have to think on this some more...