Providing resources for assisting like-minded fathers in understanding and performing their God-given responsibilities in fatherhood


Thursday, October 16, 2008

Resolved

Recently a question came up about how much of my "early days" to share with my oldest son. I didn't become a Christian until I was 27, so there were plenty of years where I lived a worldly life.

As questions come up about girls, music, drinking, drugs, etc. I have to use discretion about what to share and what not to. In the past, I have been very open with him...in fact I started to feel that I was maybe being too open. I didn't have a principle on which to base my decision about what to share.

Thankfully, this short article from Fathers.com made me consider an excellent point:

don’t share your past unless you’ve resolved it

Through God's mercy I have resolved all much of my past, see it for what it is, and have come to terms with it. Now I can warn my children about my mistakes, give them a Biblical explanation/alternative, and help them avoid the same pitfalls.

Check out the entire (short) article here:

2 comments:

a husband said...

This is a good point, and I would further define "resolved" by looking at the actions in your past the same way God does.

I get irritated with Christians who look back at their party days with fond memories. Like they're in prison now because they know they need to be, but those days...those days were great.

If you sit down with your son and reveal things to your son that you haven't called sin yet, he is most definitely going to walk away with the wrong message.

Dave Conklin said...

Thanks for the comment. You are so right. It is important for him to see me calling those things "sin" that are sin.

I also let him know how much I regret those things...but how God can restore and renew. (so important to avoid operating from a place of guilt)