Five Key Transitions of Manhood

I’ve been working on the next set of manhood principles to impart to my oldest son…I always try to stay a little ahead of where he is so that I’m prepared for the next “stage”. I just read Boundaries with Teens and mined out some really good stuff that ties in with the other sets of principles I’ve already shared or plan to share.

Here’s the summary of five key transitions of maturity/manhood:

A man is relational, not alienated: He connects emotionally with others. He asks for help when needed. He gives help freely. He is vulnerable & open. He loves unconditionally. He works through problems with others, doesn’t just cut off communication.

A man is responsible, not immature: He takes ownership of his life, behavior, & attitudes. He doesn’t blame others for his problems. He shoulders responsibility as appropriate. He keeps commitments and follows through.

A man has self-control, not impulsiveness: His decisions are based on deliberate judgments, not impulses or desires. He does things that need to be done, even if he doesn’t “feel” like it. He develops his talents and passions. He is engaged in an upfront life, not nurturing secret sins.

A man is values-based, not peer-driven: He has standards and ethics; he doesn’t just go with the flow. He knows what he believes and why he believes it. He is anchored to a transcendent cause. No one “owns him” other than God. He is not a “yes man”.

A man is autonomous, not dependant: He is not dependant financially, emotionally, or spiritually on someone else. He is able to live freely on his own before only God. There is no need for him to be carried by others; although he is not threatened by receiving help from others (see #1). He sets his own goals, makes his own decisions, and solves his own problems.